Love is the focus in February. With Valentine’s Day approaching, we turn our thoughts to relationships. Whether you’re already in a loving relationship or you’re looking for a loving relationship, Feng Shui principles can enhance your ability to manifest love and create a deeper bond once you’re in a relationship. If you are looking for love, the first thing is to be honest with yourself about why you want someone in your life. If you think it’s what will make you “happy” or you want someone to save you from your current life, that’s not the energy you want to send into the universe. If you’re in a loving relationship, you have to work at it and find your happiness within…never give the keys to your happiness to someone else. That said, if you’ve done the INSIDE work (you love yourself and are happy in your own right) and you are willing to compromise your autonomy in exchange for someone with whom you can share life, then let’s get started!
Love in Your Environment
Let’s first begin with the overall environment. There should be ample space for both you and your love. Both parties should have ample (if not equal) storage space, work space, leisure space and space for individual hobbies. If one or the other has to be relegated to a garage or off-site storage, there’s inequity. While relationships are always a compromise, the inequity of lack of space for one or the other partner is an energy that, over time, can lead to a breakdown in the relationship. If you are single and want to attract a love interest, you have to make space for them IN ADVANCE, because that energy of open space is an invitation. If you’re already in a loving relationship, does your environment support you both equally? Or is there inequity/imbalance? I like to add a pair of rose quartz hearts to the environment, especially in the bedroom and I recommend that you raise the love vibration with a regular spritz or diffuser with rose or lavender. If florals aren’t your thing, try citrus, lemongrass, or incense.
- Ample seating for two or more. Symmetry is optimal: a pair of chairs, a loveseat or sofa with a pair of side tables and 2 lamps.
- Wall decor should be inviting…never risque/obscene or violent; don’t display weaponry…it sends an entirely different message, which isn’t loving 😉
- Keep the color of the decor light and airy, with ample space for two people to move freely
- The bed should have space on both sides for both parties to move freely around the bed. Don’t cram a bed into a corner. This makes it difficult for the person who sleeps next to the wall to get in and out of the bed.
- The bedside tables should be similar in visual weight and height. If there’s a massive difference in the height/bulk of the bedside tables, there will be “overbearing” energy on one side and what you want is a balance of energy. When I see this in a bedroom there’s always a power struggle in the relationship.
- Closet and drawer allotment should be equitable. Some people have more personal items than others, but neither partner should feel like they have to fit into the allotted space with a shoe horn while the other is spread out all over the room.
- Wall decor should be restful and romantic. Paintings or photos should be of natural settings, flowers, romance or even pairs of wildlife that mate for life, such as swans. This is no place for dragons and dungeons, family photos, or images of single people.
- Furnishings should have symmetry/balance: 2 bedside tables, 2 lamps, etc…and ALWAYS a solid headboard
- The bedding should be inviting, even sensual. Stick to neutral colors. This is a place for rest and romance, NOT a palace of ill repute.
- No exercise or work-related equipment, and if you must have a TV at least put it in a cabinet or drape it with a lovely scarf when not in use.
- Avoid over-furnishing. There has to be room to move and breathe. Even a small space can feel more open if you select light colors in the paint, bedding and furnishings. Dark furniture and colors will make the room feel confining
- Lighting can make such a difference in a space. If you read in bed, by all means provide for that, but there should also be low-level ambient lighting. This can be done by adding a dimmer to your overhead or installing architectural lighting. I’ve even added a string of LED lights to a headboard for a little glamor and sparkle.
More often this is where the rubber meets the road. Some couples have “his” and “hers” bathrooms when the master bath is very small, but ultimately, the preference is that there’s space for both partners to have space for the basics. Organization and purging unnecessary toiletries is often all that’s needed to open space for another person. We tend to buy products that we never or rarely use but because we spent money on them, we hang onto them. When those items linger we send a message to the universe that we have no room for someone in our life.
Love is Your Decision
When you have made the deep decision to be open to welcoming someone else into your life, you will be sending that invitation into the universe. Being happy with your own company and your life doesn’t mean that you can’t share it with someone else. However, if you tell yourself that you are not sure you want to share your space or answer to someone else, then you are pushing back on the idea of a romantic partnership. However, once you’ve reached the right time and you’ve opened yourself and your environment to the idea of a love interest, sit down and write a letter to your “love” in the present tense. This is not a wish list. This is a celebration of the man/woman you love. Be careful that this is not a “laundry list” of attractive qualities and deal breakers. It’s a love letter. If you are in a relationship, take time to write a letter to your love, telling him/her everything about him/her and your life together that you appreciate and treasure.
Whether you are in a loving relationship or open to one, make time to celebrate yourself and the two of you as a couple. Keep your spaces uncluttered, tidy, and in good repair. No matter the size of your space, it can be your haven…and your bedroom should be your romantic sanctuary from the rest of your life. Never argue there. Never take anger, sadness or angst into your bedroom. Release any negative entities or feelings prior to entering this serene sanctuary of love and relaxation.
A Valentine’s Day Celebration
Prepare a special Valentine’s Day celebration, whether you are in a relationship or not. Turn back your bed and dim the lights/light candles (don’t leave fire unattended), spray the linens with your favorite essential oil (rose essence is fitting). Use an oil diffuser as well, or spray the room and any cloth items such as curtains or upholstered pieces. Roll up your letter or put it in an envelope and tie it with a red or pink ribbon. Set out a bucket of champagne, some chocolates, and a bouquet of red roses (or sprinkle rose petals on the bed). Once you’ve prepared your environment, prepare yourself and turn on a playlist of nature sounds or other soothing, romantic music. Now you’re ready for your love to arrive for a celebration of your love. Pour the champagne and give him/her your letter. If you’re single, you’ll settle into this romantic space and read the letter aloud yourself…visualizing him/her with you in this moment.
Wishing you the love you deserve!
If you would like to have a personalized inventory and assessment of your home with specific recommendations for attracting or enhancing your love life, contact me to schedule an appointment.